Thursday, April 23, 2009

A Break from Work...

Finn and I are headed to the Tulip Festival today, a Mom and Boy date.

I haven't posted in a long time, and that feels odd. I have wanted to, but have not been able to sit down and focus.

I've been working.

I got what I asked for in my last post. Life swung into gear.

Summer contracts over my desired amount. An interview on Monday for more grant-writing work. A voiceover audition. An acting audition coming up. And lots of good ideas flowing for my novel.

Now I have to do the work associated with those contracts. My old job, running the youth theatre. It feels good to stretch back into that.

And I have to keep showing up for my afterschool drama class, searching for ways to engage these kids without going crazy. I felt like such the mean, bad teacher yesterday. My classroom management skills, so good normally, are taxed and just not effective in this community classroom with 15, 16, 19 kids swooping in and out yelling and cartwheelling (literally) and mock-fighting and real-fighting. I need help. I need a plan, man. When we sit and do artwork - like making a collage, a puppet, a folder - we are okay. When we get up to do drama, all is LOST.

Any good ideas out there? Any cool puppet ideas? Other crafts?

And sometimes, I still get stuck in future worry. When and how will my husband get his new hip? What kind of work and income will I have after August? Will Finn be okay in kindergarten? What if he is not? What will we do?

And I can literally feel my shoulders rise towards my ears as my breaths get shorter and higher and I am panting with worry...

So - stop. Breathe deeply. Today, the road heads north. Tulips are waiting. It's easy. It's just today.

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